A few days from starting the new (my last!) semester, and despite the many sparkling positives, all I can seem to think is
sigh "Here we go again."
Which kind of sucks. I am at that nadir of long holidays, the last week before school starts. Boyfriend has again left town to return to his school in BFE. I should about now be simultaneously becoming bored by having no meaningful activity about and feeling guilty about not producing any meaningful activity, and therefore ready to rejoice upon being bestowed a schedule with deadlines and reading assignments and obligations. But no. Despite (or because of?) having fantastic quasi-spontaneous shenanigans with some high school friends and getting other "visitin'" done, I just feel the creepings of loneliness that the indifferent affections of my two cats cannot quite quell. Not, mind you, the kind of feeling that evokes the "oh I can't wait to see all my friend-people to whom I am only connected be school-type activities". That feeling, though admittedly present is outweighed greatly by the "oh god I have to do things" feeling that makes me just want to furl up in a tiny ball on the couch and watch mediocre sitcoms on Netflix until the Earth is flung out of orbit. So mostly it's just kind of a pathetic, paralyzing inertia that has me rooted here. Quite unfortunate, considering the last few days have been good ones and stuff has actually been getting done. But true nonetheless. Yet the non-bizarro Earth continues to spin on its axis, and so the rigors of doing things will whisk me out of my melancholy and into, well, doing things. Right?
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