Obstructions

Just finished watching The Five Obstructions by Lars von Trier and Jorgen Leth. An interesting film in a few ways, but it definitely succeeded in making me think about two things:

1.) How incredibly nervous Lars von Trier makes me.

2.) How far and how hard would I/am I willing to be pushed for art?

I don't have an answer for that second one, but I think it's pretty damn important. I accept that in many (most? all?) cases, some degree of externally imposed hard-assery is required. This is why I am grateful when teachers, friends, etc. critique my work--I can't do it myself, at least not past a certain point. But just how much pushing, how much grinding their work into the ground, is beneficial? If you push the artist past the edge, does he transcend, or just fall over? This question lingers eternally in the process of creativity, so I will skim past this general form and ask "what about me?" Can I be encouraged to progess, tempted with a carrot, or do they have to get out the stick?

As I grope along developing my writing, I (however cringingly) am more and more inclined to opt for the latter. I need whatever artificial pride I have taken from me and crushed into tiny little pieces. I need to have my best piece vivisected while I watch, so that I may better understand its organs. Even at my harshest, I cannot tear what I have to shreds as must be done. I want it to be done, so I can stitch them back up. I need a crazy Rocky-esque writing training montage.

That being said, encouragement (without the unfortunately usual high fructose corn syrup sweetness) is a powerful tool in the right hands. But it, too, needs to be applied externally, productively. Otherwise I just look like a crazy person.

I can't do this alone, but damned if I'm going to just hand my pride over. That would defeat the entire point.